Monday, August 4, 2008

I HATE! Men with Long Fingernails

Good Lord! This is one of the more revolting trends I will discuss on this blog. Long fingernails - when too long - are disgusting on both men and women, but when men have overly-long fingernails, it's really f-ing gross. It really is truly disgusting. And what I can't figure out is WHY men would need long fingernails in the first place. Long fingernails are considered to be a predominantly feminine trend, no? The only reasons a guy would need long fingernails is if a) he is a coke-head and uses the long nails to do bumps when no key can be found, b) he doesn't own a nail clipper and adamantly opposes biting his nails, or c) he keeps them extra long for back-scratching purposes.

Let me assure you, this entire line of questioning runs through my head every time I walk into the deli across the street from my apartment because there is a particular cashier there who has ONE (as in singular) LONG PINKY FINGERNAIL. Jesus, is it gross. I kind of squirm and / or cringe every time I catch a glimpse of the mutant nail touching whatever I am purchasing on that particular day. I try to look away as he is bagging my groceries (ok, usually it's just beer, but still).

Admittedly, I may be slightly bias on this issue, however, as there was once a fellow I knew who really wronged me, and HE had slightly over-the-length-limit-for-men fingernails. I will freely admit that because I really detest this fellow and loathe his name and any memory I have of him, that this clouds my judgment on the long-fingernails-on-men issue. But still - I cannot believe that I will ever be able to locate a woman who finds this offensive practice attractive or enthralling. Thoughts?

P.S. I really wanted to post a picture of Freddy Kruger (because he has really-long, albeit metal, fingernails), but my computer had a brain fart and wouldn't allow it, so I posted the above photo instead. Just imagine that fellow touching you with those nails. Enjoy!


Anonymous said...

Fuck you.

Anonymous said...

Time for men to have long fingernails. Who cares. Who. Cares. Lol. Who. Cares. Lol

Anonymous said...

Yes, one long fingernail, especially pinkie is a coke thing. Seeing as he is just a cashier and probably cannot afford blow, though, he is probably doing it to LOOK like he can.